Living the Dream: November & December

Hello you! I know you have been ignored and I am sorry. The last two months of 2023 brought some joy but also immense sorrow. In coping with these feelings I have started to think deeper about some aspects of my own life.

Shortly before my mom passed in December, I learned my 6th grandchild was on the way. When we visited her a few months prior, my DIL asked her what advice she could share about parenting, being the most experienced in the group. She answered, “Have more!” Upon returning home, they found out they were indeed expecting their 2nd child. The thought of this beautiful new soul coming into my life brought some light to this dark space.

Grief can be overwhelming, and it manifests itself in ways we don’t always recognize. When we think about dealing with the death of a loved one, we often just think about sadness. But I discovered other emotions, including stress, anger, and maybe even resentment. We traveled to Colorado to spend Christmas with family, and although everyone was extremely kind and sympathetic, I feel the trip was just too soon. Being with the kids and grandkids was a tremendous comfort, but the celebration of the season wasn’t what it should be with her gone, especially given her love of the true meaning of Christmas. I felt very aware of the fact that I no longer have parents walking this earth, and it’s a lonely realization.

November

In addition to the growing concerns about Mom’s declining health, I experienced some health scares of my own in November. Fortunately, all have been taken care of with optimal results but it weighed heavily on my mind for a good portion of the month. We had some bright spots in November with a drive up to beautiful Sedona in the first week followed by a visit from the in-laws mid-month. We made a quick jaunt to Vegas for Thanksgiving dinner at our favorite Italian restaurant Casa di Amore. I played more golf in the month and I am finding my game is improving substantially. I managed a couple of posts for the blog but I lacked the focus and time that is usually allocated for it. 

December

My mom passed two days before my 62nd birthday. She was 89 years old and had been in a nursing facility for most of the year. Even when it’s expected, the death of a parent is shocking. My youngest son and his family came from California for a few days and I can tell you there is nothing like a lively 2-year-old granddaughter to bring joy to an otherwise sad occasion. We exchanged gifts, had Breakfast with Santa at the club, and took multiple rides around the neighborhood in the golf cart to see the lights. It was a bright few days leading up to the trip to Wichita for the memorial. The service was lovely and brought some closure to a situation that I had been dealing with from afar. I appreciated my kids and sweet twin granddaughters there by my side and I reconnected with friends and family that I hadn’t seen in many years. It was only a week after our return that we got back on a jet for our trip to Colorado. It was mentally exhausting. 

Welcome 2024

As the new year started I started observing the posts around the blogosphere regarding Words of the Year and New Year’s Resolutions. As I anticipate what my own 2024 holds I took a look back at my goals for 2023. Some I hit and others I will be hopeful to meet this year instead. But that’s okay. I will continue to work towards these along with some new objectives. I am optimistic about what is to come. I am planning time with the kids and grandkids along with other travel. I will have more time for events at the golf club and hope to be more active physically and socially there. Maybe I will pick up some work a couple of days a week. I love this time in my life when I have options and can change course as needed or desired. I am ready to shake 2023 which brought worry and grief and start fresh. It makes me think of the Gloria Estefan song Coming Out of the Dark which sets up Brighter as a fitting Word of the Year for me.

Quote of the Month